For most of my life I’ve had it stuck in my mind I was the victim of abuse as a child. But I realize now that I chose my father. I chose all the experiences I’ve ever gone through.

It was hurting me in the present to not let go of that victimhood. It had manifested in my body as physical pain. For years it was alcoholism. I’m no longer going to do that. I’m moving on and I’m going to start expressing gratitude for all that ever happened to me because without any part of it I wouldn’t be who I am today. And I really like that man.

(The art is unrelated and just for you to enjoy.)

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I’m rewriting my past.
‘Cause I can do that.
No longer the victim
Because it’s my dictum.

I can’t believe I let myself
Tarry this long.
Believing I suffered abuse.
I wrote songs
Cursing my dad—
Blaming him for the pills.
I’ve grown exponentially
In just a few years.
My childhood was golden
Had all that I needed.
My soul spoke the pain to me
Reader, I heeded.