I agreed to play Your Romeo
On stage to entertain.
But when the whole thing started,
Juliet went insane.
She was freaking the fuck out backstage:

“You mean I have to DIE???”

I told her, “No, it’s just pretend!”

She said, “That is a lie!
I’ve read the script!
It explicitly says,
‘She stabs herself in chest.’
Now, you explain that shit to me!
If it doesn’t mean my breast!
That’s where I locked my heart away
To save it for YOUR ass!
And you are going to die too, Dolt!
But I must do it last!”

I tried to talk to her for hours,
Benvolio then showed.

“How do you like them apples?”

Said he.

I said, “Where are your clothes?
This is not a contest, Coz!
It’s just a little drama!
Juliet is not a prize!
This will not end in trauma!”

He laughed and took his set of keys;
Unlocked the back door.

“It’s time to exit stage left, Coz.
You don’t need this no more.”